The Science of Stephanie

I really think some mathematician out there could develop algorythyms based on my life....
First there is the "Workweek Ratio". The further we get into the week, the less motivation I have to drag my butt out of bed, no matter the job I'm currently at. (multiply this formula by three during the summer)
Next is what I like to call the "Menstral Munchies". The closer I get to...ahem..."commencing my cycle" (yes, I just went there), the more disgusting my eating habits become. Taco Bell? Oh yes, but only if eaten in bed while watching Project Runway. Three cupcakes washed down with Orange Crush? Don't mind if I do. Now I've never been heralded for my healthy eating, but the thought of something that isn't from a drive thru will actually make my stomach turn during my special time. So, I end up eating like a stoned frat boy, minus the beer. Thanks a lot, Aunt Flo.
Third is the "Self Esteem Shopping Slope". The less I like about my life when I enter a mall, the more likely I am to randomly buy things I don't need or will rarely use in an effort to distract from my problems. For this reason I will avoid Bath and Body Works after an especially bad breakup.
And last but not least is the most magical of all- the "Diminished Dating Continum". The older I become, the more guilted I become about needing to make efforts to meet guys. However, there is a catch, because this increased effort and enthusiasm aslo usually leads to an inevitable halt in motivation and influx of frustration. This also will often lead to Taco Bell and cupcakes. Such an enigma.
Of course, none of this is an exact science, but if any aspiring nerds out there would like to study these or my other habits, I bet you'd probably at least win a nobel prize.